Musings on psychological wealth

When my mom was diagnosed with cancer, I fell into an immediate pit of anxiety and depression. While I wasn’t surprised, I was frustrated that I could not manage my emotions. I googled endless papers to logically work my way out of the rut. I listened to podcasts. I spent hours trying to rationalize my way out of anxiety with friends. It wasn’t until I was chatting with a colleague who told me about the Hedonic Treadmill (original source) that I had an aha moment. The crux of the conversation was: Yes, this is terrible. But you will get back to your emotional baseline at some point because humans are wired that way.

I was experiencing a phenomenon known as hedonic adaptation — a departure from my baseline state of mind.

As I learned more about hedonic adaptation, I found evidence to back the point up. Research shows that lottery winners may experience a brief burst of joy. But winning the lottery does not make them happier in the long run, similar to how the honeymoon period has become recognized as a brief, but happy, stint at the start of a relationship. This is referred to as a temporary boost. After the honeymoon period, the irritable become irritable. The anxious resume anxiety. The content remain content. They adapt to the circumstances quickly. People continuously strive for new things and achievements, only to remain at the same level of happiness.

Research also shows the inverse. People who experience causes for acute depression — such as loss of mobility, heartbreak, etc. — do not stay depressed forever. Eventually, their mood shifts back to their baseline. In short, individuals are capable of recovering from major losses or traumas. And when they do, the phenomenon known as hedonic adaptation is perceived as resilience (source). People's happiness levels tend to return to a stable baseline despite significant positive or negative changes.

If you are reading this — anxiously — realizing you don’t love your baseline, your baseline can be improved. Probably alongside a mental health professional. And if you are reading this during a hard time, remember that you will snap back to your baseline at some point.

Note for parents

A hidden source of generational wealth is psychological. Kids who are born to emotionally regulated parents are often gifted emotional regulation. Many of my most successful (and often privileged) colleagues are content people. And nearly all the founders I know also have content baselines. I don’t think it is a coincidence. As a parent, I think about how to positively impact my children’s emotional baseline often. And how to build resilience. How to encourage them to build trust in themselves.

Here is some more cool reading on this topic, I am fascinated by it.